Facing the Impossible

Immediately upon hearing her words, tears welled up in my eyes and frustration and anger burned within my heart.

I miss the next part of the conversation because I’m looking up to the sky asking God…”really??? you WERE supposed to reveal to the doctors what is going on and you don’t? really??”

She stops speaking.  She said, Ms. Wikle did you hear me? Megan’s CT Scan was normal except for a small twist in her intestines.

I told her I understood her, but didn’t understand what could be causing all of this.

It’s a process she said.

I shake my head and by now, tears are streaming down my cheeks.  

My heart hurts for my daughter.  She has endured so much and is just now 18.  This last year alone has been filled with test after test only to hear "everything is normal." First her stomach was paralyzed and then 3 years later, something DIFFERENT is causing her food not to stay down but NO one knows what it is…. 

Really??

Frustrated I ask what next.  2 more test are ordered.  One of which was done almost exactly a year ago.

We are journaling what will stay down.  2 teaspoons of grits, 4 spoons of mashed potatoes.  4 oz of applesauce or yogurt, 1 spoon of scrambled eggs with the hopes that it can help them to see or think of what could be going on.

Really – is this the life she is destined to live?  

I don’t understand, I don’t know what God wants us to see.  My heart is filled with what Lord, what do you want?

After much prayer and saturating my heart with verse after verse, I realize I may never know, I realize thing may or may not change and she may never eat more than that. 

I know God is faithful and only God’s grace will get us through.

We are facing the impossible. 

For comfort, I search the scriptures for those who faced the impossible.

• Children of Israel – faced death by Pharaoh’s army or death in the Red Sea – impossible….but God stepped in and brought them safely to the other side of the sea.
• Esther and her entire race of people faced death and their fate was sealed by the King – impossible….but God stepped in and prepared the way for them to defend themselves.
• Elijah stood alone and faced hundreds of false prophets – impossible….but God was on his side and that was all he needed.
• Daniel faced hungry lions because of his faithfulness to pray – impossible….but God shut the lion’s mouths and gave Daniel the peace that only God can pour out.
• The 3 Hebrew Children were tossed into the fiery furnace that was so hot, the guy that opened the door was burned to death – impossible….but God walked in the fire WITH them.
• Sarah longed for a son and God had promised her and Abraham that their seed would exceed the grains of sand and stars in the sky and now she was past child bearing years – impossible….but God gave her a son and kept His promise
• Abraham was asked to make a sacrifice – of his one and only son – impossible….but God supplied a lamb upon seeing that Abraham was willing to offer up his son as the Lord had asked.

Impossible……

With God all things are possible:

Philippians 4:13 – I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me

Jeremiah 32:27 - Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh: is there any thing too hard for me?

Genesis 18:14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD?

How long will this continue? I don’t know.  

Will more tears fall? Yes – until she is healed, fixed or whatever needs to be done for her to consume a normal meal.

Do I trust God with her? yes…completely.  It’s all I got and thankfully it’s all I need.

Will I cry out in frustration, anger and ask why? Probably.  I’m a mom and we hate to see our children suffer.

I will continue to pray, to saturate our family in prayer and trust the Lord as HE can bring us through the impossible.

Will you pray with us? 

Will you trust God through the impossible with us?

I can only imagine the ministry that He has prepared for Megan as a young lady.  I pray daily that God will give her the strength to continue on this journey so that God can get all the glory.

I know God will use this and HER in a mighty way.

We will face the impossible….but we are not facing it alone.

Thank you Lord for the mercy and grace you pour out. I trust you with my family.  Strengthen our faith and love as we walk this journey together. in Jesus name I ask...amen.

Letting Go

Letting go is one of the most difficult things ever.  You know I’m telling the truth here! It doesn’t matter what “it” is, it is hard to let go.

Letting go means you place 100% trust in whomever you are letting things go to.  It means that you have confidence in that person to handle things better than you would handle them yourself. 

You relinquish all control and you step away, trusting.

Letting go signifies great faith.

We have so much to let go of don’t we? I’ll list just a few that quickly come to mind:

• Emotional baggage from the past
• Fear of failure for the future
• Fear of success
• Choices we’ve made and the outcome that is sure to follow
• Our children and their choices
• Our health, appearance and physical features
• Our finances, or lack thereof
• Our dreams, desires and opportunities that await us
• Our fear of the unknown – the what if’s, why’s and what was I thinking
• Our yesterday, so we may enjoy today, while looking towards tomorrow

Many think that letting go is a sign of weakness, but in all actuality, it displays great strength and faith.

I want that kind of faith.

I want to easily let go and let God.

As a Christian we are “letting go” of those things to the Lord.  Our Savior! Our heavenly Father! The Kind of Kings, Lord of Lords and name like no other.

We aren’t just letting go to some other person that just halfheartedly cares about us – NO, we are letting go to the ONE who gave HIS Son for us as a sacrifice.  We are letting go to the ONE that cares for our desires, hopes and dreams like no other.  

We are letting go to the one who created us and then planned that everything would work out for us as He planned.  We are letting go to the ONE who overcame death, hell and has endured anything we could ever endure.

I pray that you’ll confidently let go of whatever it is that weighs you down, knowing that the One you are trusting your eternity to is the ONE you are letting go of your problems, hopes, dreams and fears to.

Let go and Let God!

What do you need to hand over to God?  Many people see this site daily and I’m sure they would be encouraged to see that they “are not alone” in handing over a few things.

Encourage someone in the comments below.

(I’ll start out by leaving mine here)

This comes from a dream that I recently had.  In the dream our family is struggling with all that we are currently struggling with. I felt extremely small and overwhelmed at the things we faced. The dream was very chaotic and fear ruled my heart.  (I won’t bore you with the gory details, but my daughter’s health, the finances that have hit us due to this, my son spending his first summer so far away – completely in God’s will, but still painful as I miss him much more than anyone could ever imagine and several other things)

I was walking and praying as I so often do and somehow ended up on a bridge.  I have a horrid fear of heights and this was really, really high.  Immediately my fear kicks in and I’m frozen.  I can’t think and can barely breathe when the bridge starts to crumble.  It’s foggy and I can’t see below.  I’m hanging on for my life and I hear, clearly, God saying… “trust me, let go”

I’d love to say that immediately, I just let go, but I can’t.

I did what most of us do and cried out in fear and anguish, “but Lord, I’m scared just get me off here” He again, said…”trust me, let go.”

At that point, with tears flowing, my heart was thinking ok, it seems I don’t have a choice, but I woke up before I let go, so I don’t actually know if I truly trusted God enough to let go.

When I woke up, I had been crying in my sleep….that is just how fearful I had been.

So, today…right here, right now… as best as I know how, I’m letting it all go to Him.

My family – I prayed for a Christian family, HE gave me one…they belong to Him.  Lord, just keep using us for YOU.

My finances – with more appointments, specialists, surgery and such looming, there is no way we can ever afford any of it without the Lord. (When the dr. left the room, the first question Megan asked was….Mom, can we afford this? I told her it is a non-issue, that God will provide.)  It belongs to Him.

My dream of a larger home – we’ve lived in a tiny 1100 sq ft home since Megan was born. If I get a bigger home, I get one.  If not, I’ll enjoy my mansion in Heaven one day.

Spreading Joy & Helping Others - God allowed me to start this and HE will have to fund it.  I won’t borrow money to help people.  If we help others, it’s because God will put it on the hearts of others to partner with us.  We will do what we can with what we have. It’s His.

I’m going to just trust Him.  It’s all I can do.  It’s all HIS.  I’m letting go.

{{hugs}}

 there may be additional comments at our main site - http://spreading-joy.org  

Never Let Go – David Crowder  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hx5Y9DhoLJQ

Never Once - Matt Redman  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e02UNZRsdSQ

Overcome – Jeremy Camp http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERMzo0npg_g

John 16:33
These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

1 John 5:4
For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith.

1 John 5:5
Who is he that overcometh the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the Son of God?

Psalms 55:22 Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

Where is Goodness & Joy

The other day I was talking with a friend that I had not talked to in a while.  

Knowing that she had been through a deep, horrible loss with the death of her beloved brother, I emailed her to let her know I was thinking of her and praying for her.

Through a series of emails, she made a statement to me that many of us often forget when the pain is overwhelming and the darkness has consumed our days.

She said:

“Goodness does still exist here, you just have to look real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real hard.”

Here, among many other things, is what I shared with her.

 “Goodness is still here.  The negative overshadows it.  Hurt covers it.  Pain hides it.  Uncover the goodness!”

Pain, discouragement and disappointment can and often does bring isolation.  Then the depression creeps in.  When that happens, JOY is covered up and because you don’t “feel happy”, the negative emotions take over.

Happiness is a fleeting emotion, while Joy is undeniable faith in an almighty God, who has your best interest at heart.  We may not always understand our pain, anguish or why we don’t seem to be reaping the goodness we've sowed, but we can claim great joy in the Lord as we walk through the hardships that lay ahead.

I’ve had several people tell me that the only reason I can be actively spreading joy the way I do is because things are good and/or that I’m just looking at the world through rose colored glasses.

When I speak of spreading the joy of the Lord “regardless of circumstances,” I speak from experience.   

Yes, I’m so blessed! Yes, my needs are met and many of my wants are met as well.  Yes, I have a wonderful husband, 2 amazing kids and family that I adore.  Yes, I have a job to pay the bills and to give support to Spreading Joy with.  But yes…I do know pain, hurt and just how dark negativity can make things.

There have been times that I’ve looked up towards heaven and said “seriously???? Lord?? Really?”

There have been times that I’ve sobbed, not just cried, but poured out my heart to the Lord saying, “again??? Must we endure this again?”

There have been times when grief has so filled my heart with sadness that I simply couldn't get out of bed.

There have been times when I’ve wondered… “when Lord?  When will a positive answer to prayer come”

There are things on my “only GOD” prayer list that I look at and wonder can I muster up a grain of a mustard seed sized portion of faith for those needs.

There have been times that my hearts tells the Lord, “I’m sorry, Lord.  I’ve completely failed you and I don’t have the wisdom to take the next step”

And as much as I try not to, there are those times when I whisper in my heart, “why Lord.  Why? I simply don’t get it!”

But I can firmly stand on the Word of the Lord with Nehemiah 8:10 saying the joy of the LORD is my strength.  Am I always happy? No, I’m not.  But do I have joy through sorrow? Yes, I do.

So, how do we find the goodness and find joy that gets hidden during these horrid times in our lives?

We look for them, seek them, choose them and keep them.

1. Look for the good. There is usually something good about each and every day.  Trouble is our heart is so discouraged that it shuts its eyes to anything but the negative that surrounds the trouble.  Uncover the joy that is waiting to be discovered.
2. Use praise as a weapon.  Being openly grateful about the blessings in our world will drive discouragement away.  Don’t get me wrong, it may be a fight between your heart and mind, but it is worth it.  Praise the hurt away.  Sing until the clouds lift from over your heart.
3. Laugh.  I love laughing and sometimes, I laugh at the most inappropriate time, which tends to end up being funnier for those around me.  When your heart is in despair, find your favorite cartoons, your favorite funny shows and watch them.
4. Saturate your day with the Word of God.  Listen to the Bible, read the Bible. Find some online preaching.  We should be in God’s word daily anyway, but more so when we don’t “feel like it.”
5. Pray!  Surround yourself with the Comforter Himself.  God knows your heart, empty it of the hurt that is filling it up and let God’s joy strengthen you.
6. Do something for others. Don’t let negative feelings about how small "your something for others is" cloud your heart. Just do it.  I’m telling you, and I’ll keep telling you – go and give a box of Little Debbie Cakes away or a pack of Reese’s Cups.  The smiles will be unbelievable.
7. Dig deep into your memory.  On the days when the sorrow is so great due to a horrible loss and you are working your way through the pain of that particular event, do something powerful and REMEMBER something good, just for a few moments.  I know this kind of day.  Even though you have great peace and trust the Lord to carry you through, the pain is so great that you wonder how you’ll function.  Use the memories of something awesome to remind your heart that “this too shall pass” and just how amazing God’s grace truly is.

This in no way is an exhaustive list, but it is things that I do and turn to time and time again.

I’ve been sending out a message on twitter for a while now.  I will send it out almost daily as I know different people will see it at different times.  It says

JOY....  Choose it today! Look for it today... Expect it TODAY!

In the middle of your discouragement, remember the joy is right there too.  Your eyes are closed to it because sometimes it is just easier to see the darkness.  But remember, even in the darkest night, all it takes is one flicker and that flicker can be seen for miles.

Uncover the goodness; don’t let it slip by you without you grabbing hold of it.

How do you uncover the goodness and joy that is within your reach?

Will you share some of what gets you through the dark times?

What verse or verses get you through?

Inspire someone by leaving a comment.

Whatever the Day May Bring

Whatever your day has brought you - PRAISE HIM!

If it brought you sun, praise HIM - If it brought you rain, praise HIM

If it brought you a bonus, praise HIM - If it brought you an unemployment check, praise HIM

If it brought you a new car, praise HIM - If it brought you news you need a new motor, praise HIM

If it brought you warm hugs and kisses, praise Him - If it brought you despair and grief, praise HIM

If it brought you a trip to your favorite place, praise HIM - If it brought you to the hospital or doctor office, Praise HIM

If it brought you gladness and smiles, praise HIM - If it brought you tears and sorrow, praise HIM

If it brought you peace and harmony, praise HIM - If it brought you uncertainty and fighting, praise HIM

If it brought you encouragement and direction, praise HIM - If it brought you discouragement and road blocks, praise HIM

If it brought you good news of promotion or healing, praise Him - If it brought you heartbreaking news or disease, praise HIM

If it brought you smiles and laughter, praise HIM - If it brought you anger and yelling, praise Him

Whatever this day has brought you, place your hope in the Lord and simply praise HIM

Psalm 9:2
I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy name, O thou most High.

Psalm 34:1
I will bless the LORD at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth.

Boldly Face Tomorrow

Trials WILL come; it’s just a matter of when.

Tears WILL fall; it’s just a matter of how long.

Your Heart will break; it’s just a matter of how many pieces.

I understand this isn’t spreading joy, but it IS truth.

We can boldly face another day with a little preparation; after all, it is just a matter of time before we face storms and trials.

I believe I can say for certain that each one of us will face the following things:



Uncertainty:

You don’t know what you’ll be facing. You don’t know what situations will arise that are beyond your control. You don’t know about job issues, medical bills and other things. You don’t know what you’ll be facing. Choose to focus on the facts, not the uncertainty. Look at the facts and allow that to help give you direction. Sometimes all it takes is looking at things from a different view point. Don’t allow your emotions to drive you. Emotions are a tricky beast and can have our minds full of fear and doubt. Even when facing uncertainty, choose to maintain a good attitude while fixing what you can and working around the rest.



Disappointment:

I wish that you didn’t have to face disappointments, but the truth is that you WILL face it. Prepare for it in advance by looking for the good in the disappointment. It’s an old saying, but still rings true today, look for the silver lining. It’s always easier to see the negative, but if we teach ourselves to see the positive, it will get easier to find through each disappointment. I’m not telling you to ignore your hardships, I’m simply instructing you to look beyond them at what treasure may be forming because of the hardship.

The positive things are there, you have to look for them!



Fear:

Fear will consume us. You’ll be so afraid to do anything, to make decisions or even just take the next step if you are not aware of just how consuming fear is. Set your fears aside and focus on the truth of what is going on. The truth is that YOU are strong and you will make it through this. The truth is that you have people that care about you and will help you through it. Focus on the truth! Find the resources that are available and see if those will lead to more resources. As things start to fall into place, you’ll notice the fears subsiding. Let me encourage you to step out into the unknown. When you do, you’ll feel the courage coursing through you and that will give you the ability to take the next step, and the next one and the next one.



Difficulties:

When you are facing difficulties, you don’t have to face them alone. There are people who have been where you are and they are willing to walk with you. There are people who have been where you are going, they will help you out!

When we face difficulties, we clam up and withdraw and then try and face them alone. This is the time that we need to reach out so that we don’t have to battle the depression alone. Find a friend to share your fears and difficulties with and divide the pain and in doing this, you will also double the joy you share.

When you are facing difficulties that lead to depression, may I suggest you pour yourself into “others.” Regardless of the finances, we can all make a difference for others and that act alone will help bring deep down joy that no one or nothing can steal from you.

Here are 50 Ways to make a difference without spending a penny. YOU can make a difference!



Sorrow:

Facing sorrow is not easy. When someone is struggling, spend time with them, chat with them until they laugh. It doesn’t take a special talent, lots of money or gifts galore. It only takes a willing heart. Be sensitive to others when sorrows arise. Don’t assume someone should be over the grief they are going through. Don’t assume someone shouldn’t be hurting “over that situation.” We all deal with grief, pain and sorrow differently. Be sensitive and kind to those facing sorrow. If you are in the midst of sorrow or grief, know that it’s ok. There is no right way to grieve. Sometimes writing out your feelings – the good, bad and ugly is a way of releasing them. Sometimes, it’s a matter of sharing them verbally or counseling. Some may even need medical help. Whatever your means of facing your sorrow, remember YOU have friends and family that will help you face them. Don’t withdraw and try to go it alone. That’s what WE are here for.

Regret:

This is the ONE thing we can choose NOT to face. Regret. Regret will break us. The guilt of regret will weigh our hearts down and beat us.

We all have made bad decisions.

We can learn from our bad choices, we can decide that yes… I did “that” but I will NOT allow myself to be in that situation again. Don’t let regret keep you from boldly making a change in your life. Don’t let guilt keep you down when you are capable of doing so much for you and your family. Don’t let regret win. You are strong enough to use it, learn from it and then beat it.

Think about this:

If we are living in the past and worried about the future, how can we be effective today?

It’s simple - - - We can’t. Choose NOT to regret. Put those past mistakes to good use by learning from them and sharing what you’ve learned with others.



Emptiness:

There are times that you’ll feel empty, alone and like you don’t matter. It’s going to happen, it is just a matter of when. When you face this, once again I have to insist that you go on fact instead of feelings. Feelings are so tricky and emotional roller coasters are not very fun.

Here are the facts:

• YOU Matter – Not only do you matter, but you matter a LOT. You are the world to someone!


• YOU Make a difference – in so many ways. You feel as though you do nothing special and you are nothing special, but THAT is what MAKES you special. No one can make a difference like YOU do. NO one!


• YOU will make if past this – and when you do, you’ll soar to new heights that you didn’t even know existed.

Use this time of empty feelings to focus on making a difference for others instead of dwelling on how you feel. It can be as little as giving your children their favorite cereal for dinner, coloring with them in their coloring books. It could be something like telling an older friend thank you for helping to shape our world into what it is today and taking some time to hear how they did it. It could be something like extending patience to the cashier that is experiencing one rude customer after another. Take your mind off of the emptiness that is flooding your heart and place your focus on those around you. You’ll soon find the emptiness filling up with amazing JOY.



Overwhelmed:

Even the calmest person I know will face times when they are overwhelmed. It’s at this point that you simply can’t afford to feel guilty for stopping and doing something for yourself.

STOP right here, pull yourself away from everything for a little bit. Go outside, stretch and take 5 minutes to soak up the outdoors. When you can, take an some additional time to just step away from all that is pulling at you.

If you have young children, it may need to be for 15-30 minutes after they’ve gone to bed, but STOP and do something for yourself.

It doesn’t have to be expensive, it just needs to be done and done without guilt.

Read

Write in your journal

Gaze out the window

Listen to the sound of the rain

Take a nap on the couch – set a timer so you don’t over sleep.

If you don’t pull yourself out of the situation for a little bit, it will only get worse.



How are you boldly facing tomorrow? What other tips would you share with others?



To Hear an audio version of this, please click below:

Useless

Everyone has a secret…

This makes my heart smile!

I love Post Secrets. Like the secrets we hide in our hearts, there are good ones, bad ones and everything in between. If you have never heard of Post Secrets, this site is a collection of post cards that people have mailed in, releasing their secrets. This site is updated with new secrets weekly. Many of them make me smile – as not all secrets are bad. Then there are those that make me think or wonder. But then you have some that just break your heart.

Tonight, one secret did just that, broke my heart.

Trust me - YOU matter!

When I read the secret above, I wanted to reach out and wrap my arms around this person and whisper to their heart:

YOU are not useless…YOU matter

There are so many people that struggle with this. One thing I’ve noticed with nearly everyone of them is that they truly matter a lot. The trouble is that the people they are around are not the squishy hugs, you matter to me kind of emotional people. If they were, the person who sent in this secret and those that feel this way would know beyond a doubt that they truly do matter. Some people simply struggle with this just because their heart is fighting a battle that many of us can’t even begin to imagine.

What can we learn from this secret?

• The people we are around MATTER and need to know it! Tell them. Do not assume they know it.
• Everyone wants and needs to matter. We all do. We need to make a difference. Why else do little toddlers hand little yellow ”weeds” to us and we validate that?
• Many feel useless needlessly. It doesn’t cost us a single cent to hug someone important to us and tell them that they matter.
• Something so small, is actually HUGE in our lives. Amazing how far a little affirmation goes isn’t it?
• The negative things we hear stay with us far longer than the positive. Keep reinforcing the positive.
• The old rhyme we all said as a child is a lie – Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Words not only hurt us, but often times break us. Choose them wisely.
• Put it in writing! That card or letter letting someone know that they made a difference in you will likely be read and re-read time and time again.
• When you see someone or leave someone give those big squishy hugs! They matter too. Don’t be in a hurry to let go quickly. Enjoy the moment!
• When our hearts are screaming in pain, our minds simply do not remember the difference that we’ve made. Keep pictures or something that will jog our memory.
• If you make someone smile….at anytime EVER – you are NOT useless. Period! Times are tough, things are hard – smiles are priceless.
• Fearlessly be YOURSELF! We need you to be you – not who you think we want you to be. Y O U – because you are amazing!

There is so much more that can be said here.

I invite you to do a few things.

1. Look around. Have you told those that matter to you, that they matter?
2. Take stock in your own heart….do you KNOW that you matter and are NOT useless? YOU matter!
3. What would you tell someone that feels like they are useless. Please encourage others and share your thoughts in the comments below.

*whispering to your heart* You matter! YOU are making a difference!

Permission to Speak Freely

Permission to speak freely by Anne Jackson is an awesome book that talks about how we let our fears stop us from speaking freely about anything. Freely speaking on our thoughts and fears about church, relationships, addictions, depression, family etc. Her single statement “Fear Won” caught my heart. Fear wins out so often over so many things in so many of our lives. This book reminds us that we may never be completely free of fear, but that we can live a courageous life, speaking freely about the issues we have faced or are facing.

Many people struggle with depression and seasons of depression, wondering why they still fight it or are fearful of what others will think about them taking antidepressants etc. She sums it up nicely when talking about seasons of depression saying “feelings of insecurity and worthlessness is a chain I may never be able to break.”

She generously gives the gift of courage by stepping out and speaking out about her addictions, abuse and fear of talking freely about them. She says “something in us begins to come alive in us when we see people overcome fear.” We draw courage from others who, regardless of fear, stand up and speak up.

Sometimes our fears of living our dreams keep up from even taking the first step. Anne puts it this way “Their hearts are fighting for their dreams, yet fear claws away at their spirits, telling them their dreams are impossible.” Sometimes it doesn’t take much more than a single twinge of fear to hold us back.

This book is very uplifting and encouraging. Whether you are fighting seasons of depression, feelings of worthlessness, or anything else that grips your heart in fear, Permission to Speak Freely is sure to encourage you and maybe you’ll find the gift of going 2^nd is something you can give to others by sharing your story.

One of my favorite quotes by Anne:

I had now seen the redemption and freedom that occurs when the darkness is forced into the light, disguised as awkwardly spoken words

The audio book is read by Anne Jackson, the author. I feel that we could actually feel more of what she was feeling as she recounts some of what was going through her mind and heart while she was retelling her story. Very well done.

I’d like to thank Christian Audio for the complimentary copy of this book through their Reviewers’program. Follow Christian Audio on Twitter here. Check their site each month for a free audio book download. Good stuff there!

Sometimes

I share this with you today because we all feel this way…..sometimes.

The question is, do we stay “here” or do we make the choice to move on – out from under these feelings?

I hope when you are “here” in this state that we all “sometimes” are in, that you’ll choose to move beyond this….regardless of how slow it may be.

Sometimes……

http://www.spreading-joy.org

Ash Wednesday

Many people have already decided what they will be giving up for Ash Wednesday. I'd like to challenge you to look at things from a different approach.

I was chatting with Father Miles of St. Luke's Episcopal Church over coffee a few weeks ago, discussing ways that Spreading Joy could encourage his church. We were discussing the difficulties that we all face, the clouds that tend to hang over us, causing us to just see only the negative things that are surrounding us. He then had the idea that for Ash Wednesday, he would challenge his people to do something a little different this year. Instead of giving up coffee, Reese Cups, fast food or other things of that nature, that he would get them to focus on giving up negativity and replace it with JOY!

I love the idea, but as one that is always looking past the negativity and searching for joy on purpose, I know how difficult this can be. (Wait...am I being negative right there? uggghhh!!)

Replacing the negative, discouraging and depressing thoughts and actions with positive will certainly help anyone who decides to do so. When you are on purpose looking for the millions of little blessings that are swirling about you at any given time, you will be a much happier, positive person. Everyone will see a noticeable difference and want to know the source of your JOY!

Not wanting anyone to fail, I suggest that you replace, replace - replace. If you are trying to get rid of one thing, it is always easier to do so when you replace it with something better. Tell me, what is better than true joy from deep within? We can't always change the circumstances that brings the black cloud of despair over us and try to keep us down, but we can make a choice about staying "in" the negativity or moving past it.

I was speaking with a co-worker about Lent and giving up things for these 40 days today. She said that she will fast from something that will move her closer to God, such as gossip. She doesn't think that giving up coffee or Reese Cups would be wrong, but for her, personally - she wanted something that would help her to build her relationship with the Lord.

What are you giving up? Will you join others in giving up negativity and replace it with JOY, happiness, contentment and pure delight? Do you think this will be easy to do? Why or why not? If you fall short one day, will you keep going or will you simply give up?

I pray your cup overflows with unspeakable joy for these next 40 days and beyond!

{{{HUGS}}}} yall

PS

I'll have the honor of speaking and encouraging the members at St. Luke's on Sunday 3/14. I hope you'll click the link and check out this gorgeous Church.

Six Months

I didn't know it at the time but on February 20th, 2003 - I would hear news that would forever change my life. It was an honor actually, but when I was hearing it, I felt it was anything but an honor.

I was with my Dad at the hospital when the cardiologist came in to see him that morning. I knew my time with my Dad was limited, but what I was about to hear pierced through my heart like a dagger.

"John, if there is anything you want to do, do it now." I looked at the doctor and simply uttered "excuse me?"

The doctor went on to explain that my Dad's heart was only functioning at 13% or so and that it would not last more than 6 months at the very most. He told my Dad to do what he wanted to do, have what he wanted to have and take this time to get things in order. My body was numb, my heart was in shock. I remember wanting to cry out that 35 years is not enough time to spend with him. I had leaned up against the wall, to steady myself and the doctor asked me to step outside. He informed me that with my Dad's diabetes, that the sore on his foot would not heal and would contribute to his death as well - painfully so. He assured me that when the time come, he would call hospice in and make "it" as painless as possible. My heart agonized over the fact that I would not be able to stop this, that I would not be able to stop the pain and I would have to spend each and every moment with him that I could.

The doctor asked me if I was OK, and I simply nodded. We went back inside the room and he informed us that he'd be in there another day. The doctor left, I sat on the edge of the bed, wondering what was running through my Dad's heart. As I sat there, numb, my Dad spoke...asking me "Well, Daughter.....what do you think?" I immediately looked at him, eyeball to eyeball. Here I was wondering about him...and HE was wondering about me. Unbelievable. I kept looking at him and said "I think I'm going to miss you soooooo much." I sat quietly on the bed with him for a little bit. Gently crying because I didn't want to upset him to much, but there was no way I could hold in the tears.

Again, at the time, I didn't consider being with him to receive that kind of news an honor, but now I know beyond doubt that it was a priceless gift that I would not trade for the world.

Not everyone gets a six month warning to get their affairs straight, do what they want to do, see whom they want to see and so on. But he almost did. I had the difficult task to start making the calls. To tell my sister and brothers and step mom what I had just found out. I wanted anyone that wanted to see him, hug him and tell him just how special he was to have the chance to do so and time was of the essence.

As Dad got weaker, I moved in to help take care of him. I organized my work schedule to where I would work in the late afternoons or at night and help Angie take care of him during the day. I slept when he did and enjoyed many midnight egg sandwiches with him. It never bothered me that he could only eat a bite of the sandwich.

You may wonder why I'm sharing this with you. My Dad didn't get the full six months. He died on July 20th, 2003. We made sure that he laughed every chance he could and sometimes he simply laughed because he caught me and Angie "discussing things" between "ourselves" and we had NO clue he was awake. We made sure that anyone that wanted to see him had the chance and we all had time with him to tell him just how much he meant to us. I asked several times if there was anything he wanted and no matter what it was, I'd make sure he had it. Even though he was at the point nothing much would stay down when it came to food.

If you found out that you only had six months, what would you do? Who would you see? What calls would you make?

My next question is WHY would you wait until you only have six months? Start doing what you want to do. You have life dreams! Start on them. No matter how slowly you think you may be accomplishing them, start on them NOW. One of my dreams is to visit all 50 states. When we look at vacations, we look at a state we have not been to. Make the list and start chipping away at it. One of my dreams is to publish a book. In all of the spare time that I do not have, I'm slooooooowly chipping away at it. Work on those dreams NOW.

Schedule a visit with those that you have not seen and make those calls. We live in a period where it's easier now than ever to keep up with people we adore. Send the email, send the ecard or send the paper card. Tell those that are special to you just how special they are. Don't wait until you find out that you don't have much time left.

Do it now.

Six months is not long. Before we know it Christmas will be here again and it's only February.

Work towards your dreams
Plan the visit
Make the call
Give the hugs freely

Say I love you. Say it again. Say it once more.

Do it now, don't wait.

Tell me, what are some of your dreams you are working on.

Did you make the phone call, plan the visit or give the extra hugs? I hope so, I truly do!

{{{{HUGS}}}} yall

Photo: June 11, 2003 one of the last few photos of me and my dad