Sunday, March 4, 2012

25 Ways To Show Love


**This was originally published before Valentine's Day over on our MAIN Site - http://www.spreading-joy.org You can remove the follow from here & follow there to stay up to date :)


Valentine’s Day is typically the day that couples express their love for one another. Many single people have grown to dislike this day and sadly some have even come to despise this day.

May I challenge you to show those in your world that you care? Don’t give thought to if you are a couple or not.

Think of your friends that you have fun with, your cousins that you rarely get to see, that high school friend that you chat with on Facebook.

Those are the ones that you can tell how you care…after all, who doesn’t need to know that they are cared for?

Every one of us, right down to the smallest of us, need to know we are loved. Take the time to show some love today. Here are some easy peasy suggestions.

I know there are a BAzillion other ways, but I’m trying to REMOVE all excuses by using the K*I*S*S method – Keep It Simple Sweetie - since I’m married, we’ll start with the husbands and wives.

Husbands/Wives:

  1. Breakfast in bed – I bet the scene of “one serving the other” just ran through your head and you are thinking “what about me?” See, I KNOW how you are. Actually, I was thinking – 2 cups of coffee/juice, 2 bowls of cereal or favorite oatmeal and sitting close and comfy with each other in the bed, slowly starting the day. Remembering, giggling, and gazing into each other’s eyes as you talk. Nothing fancy is needed as the time together is the best part.
  2. Divide and conquer – Divide up a few chores so that you’ll have more time to spend with each other. Ladies, invite your husband to share in the dishes. Ask him if he’d come, stand behind you with his mighty arms wrapped around you while you wash. Here, it will go something like this – you - “Honey will you help me?” Himgrunt/groan You- “pleeeeeeease, it will only take 10 minutes or so” (draw out the please) Him - *sigh* ugghh – ok. He comes to you in the kitchen, you take his arms, wrap them around your waist from behind you, pull him close and proceed to do the dishes. You – “Thank you for helping with the dishes! It’s such a chore alone. You are such a hero!” Him – to busy kissing your neck to respond. Make sure you are wearing some sweet perfume so that he will be helping you by nibbling on your neck. I hate washing dishes, but if I were engulfed in my husband’s arms and he was “helping” that way, I would not mind doing the dishes at all. Guys…. HELP with any household chore and it will free up your wife to do other things. **Side Note: I have NOT tried this, but will let you know what happens when I do**
  3. Hold hands – such a lost art of love between husbands and wives. Simple, sweet…effective.
  4. Leave notes for each other – Leave notes for each other. Ladies, don’t expect the guys to acknowledge that he received it. He got it AND smiled. I use to struggle with this as I do it often, but trust me… He GETS it. Guys, this is such a SIMPLE way to your gal’s heart. She will BEAM with JOY when she finds the note you left her. Get creative, have fun and smile…knowing you are loved.
  5. His/Her night with no guilt – He is watching TV in the living room while SHE is reading a book in the bedroom. ONE of YOU schooch right up beside the other and keep doing what you were already doing. He can watch TV while you read (or play angry birds, words with friends, tweet or facebook) and just enjoy being beside each other. Who cares if SHE doesn’t watch TV with you, she IS WITH you. Who cares if HE doesn’t like sappy romance books (or angry birds, words with friends, twitter or facebook) HE is with you. Got it? good!
  6. Date Night – I don’t care if the budget is tight, there are things that the two of you can do together. Walk in the park or by the lake. If you have physical issues, sit in the garden together or enjoy sitting at the park watching the sun set. Go to McDonalds and share an order of fries. Or, go big and go to Outback Steak House or even bigger with a posh downtown restaurant. The thing is… GO ON A DATE. Monthly if at all possible.
  7. No Complaining Night – This is exactly what it says. Gals, if your guy doesn’t help don’t complain. Guys, if your wife doesn’t do the dishes after dinner, don’t complain. Gals if you don’t like how HE folds the clothes – keep it to yourself. SIDE NOTE: [whispering] wives, if your husband helps you with laundry, dishes, vacuuming, dusting, kids – ANYTHING…never ever EVER complain… don’t do it. You will DISCOURAGE him, make him feel like he can’t do anything right and stop doing it. Guys – if she doesn’t listen to me and complains anyway – walk over to her EACH time she complains and take her in your arms and smother her with kisses. Hmm, ladies….on second thought, if he starts doing this when you complain… complain all you want to.
  8. Honest Communication – Ladies, WE are the worst about this. I can NOT read your mind and neither can he. If you want something say – that would make a nice birthday gift. If you don’t like something, kindly say. If you say NOTHING is wrong, EXPECT the conversation to end. If you say you don’t want anything for Christmas – expect NOTHING. Being honest is the best. Yes, he has and will make you angry. YES YOU have and will make him angry…but telling everyone but him/her won’t fix things.
  9. Gadgets – Don’t you just love technology? I do. Find out what is something they’d like to have. Often if you simply listen to them in conversation, they will tell you. I’m already looking into a gift for my husband for Christmas this year. HE will love it….I Know he will, cause HE SAID he would, just in passing.
  10. Pal Around – Share the fun things, the bad things and everything in between. Be their best friend. Laugh together, cry together and know that no matter what you face, you are facing it together.
  11. Slow Dance – turn on some sappy music to play in the background and when he/she walks buy take their hand and slow dance for a song. Look into each other’s eyes and enjoy the song.
  12. Say I LOVE you – tell him/her that you love them. Tell them why. It doesn’t have to be poetic or rhyming. Tell why from your heart.
  13. Love yourself – YOU are special, you mean the world to your spouse…love yourself, regardless of how you feel you look. Ladies, we struggle with this more than some guys do. Society has us blinded to true beauty. We feel we have to be a size ZERO to be gorgeous. I have a pretty smile and an ok face, but not much else going for me. When my husband takes me in his arms, kisses me and tell me I’m beautiful to him… I BELIEVE IT and I feel it. Guys, when your wife tells you what a sexy hunk of man you are… Believe her and BE HER sexy hunk of man.
  14. Focus on the Positive – negative things are going to arise in a marriage. I know this and many times I’m the cause of it because I just don’t realize that I’m getting on his nerves. Focus on the positive things that you love about each other, while honestly communicating about the negative and work on those. For instance: I like to chew my ice. Steve hates it. When I’m around him, I really try to NOT do the things that he hates. I don’t point out his flaws and DWELL on them because if I’m honest with myself, HE could POINT out my flaws for days and years. Enjoy each day.
  15. Ask for Help – Ladies, our guys love to come to our rescue. Seek out your hero! Guys, sometimes we simply need a hero…be there!
  16. Special Date – Gals, you know the way to your man’s heart is through his stomach as well as sex. Romantic dinner, awesome dessert & TLC afterwards = priceless. Don’t have the time/money to get away for a special night. Let me help you with that.
    1. Dinner – Use your best dishes. Lettuce wedge with a sliced tomato, bacon bits and dressing for appetizer. Rotisserie Chicken, mashed potatoes or other veggies from the deli and special dessert
    2. Setting – home – arrange for kids to be gone, candles, soft music. If your husband has a job where he is sweaty when he comes home, set everything out while he is in the shower. He will be delighted when he see this set up.
    3. Meal – don’t be in a hurry. Enjoy each other’s time and company. Everything else is out of sight and mind. Just YOU and HIM.
    4. TLC = Gals, NOTHING in this area of sex has changed about your guy since you married him. Nothing. Justsaying. Let the evening naturally flow, spoil him and enjoy him.
  17. Special Date – GUYS, see number 16 but change up a few things. After the meal, have her remain at the table, while you light candles, turn on soft music and run her a hot bubble bath. Tell her to simply relax in the bath. While she is doing that, take the time to clean everything. [nods] yes…all of IT. Once the wrinkles have set in and the water is cold, bring her favorite thick, warm comfy pj’s to her. Her idea of TLC = schooch in close, wrap your arms around her. Kiss her goodnight and stay awake, watching her…protecting her while she slowly drifts off to sleep in your arms. She will sleep peacefully knowing that her hero has her. AND – if her idea of TLC is the same as YOUR idea, well then… stillwrap her close afterwards….watching, holding…protecting. Allowing her to fall asleep in your arms.
Friends/Family need to be shown love too
  1. Text – Technology is an amazing thing. Text pictures, hugs, laughs and smiles to tell someone you care!
  2. CALL – still a good old fashioned way of communicating to your friends and family.
  3. Mail a CARD – While I do love technology, there is nothing like receiving a card in the mail with a special note written inside.
  4. Plan Something Fun – Schedule some time for friends and extended family. Even if there are no birthdays or anniversaries, just go and have fun.
  5. Star Gaze – take your kids outside one evening and just look at the never ending galaxy of gorgeous stars. Allow them to bring their favorite pillow, stuffed animal and spend some time talking about what they see in the stars. You might just be amazed.
  6. Brag on Them – go ahead and talk about them behind their back…as long as it’s positive, uplifting and encouraging. While you are at it, TELL them how wonderful they are!
  7. Fun Breakfast – still have kids at home? Regardless of their age, they will love some homemade chocolate chip pancakes or muffins. Use fruit to make a cute face or put some out and tell them to make a face with it. Enjoy the laughter.
  8. Free to be Themselves – Make your home a haven. Regardless of who is there and when, allow their personalities to shine through, all them to be who they are without apology and build on their strengths. Don’t always point out the negative things about them, focus on the things that you love and adore about them.

There you have it, 25 fun things to do to show love. Am I a counselor? No. Do I have the perfect marriage/family? No, and I never will. Can I work on these things just like you? YES…and do.

But, just like you, I find time, finances and other “things” to get in the way. I’m working on pushing past those things and showing love where and when I can.

There are things on these 2 lists that you can do to show love as well. These items do not cost a single penny. List 1 &List 2

Life is short…spread some joy and show some love!

I’m a sappy gal… what can I say?

YOUR turn.

We are looking for easy peasy ways of showing those that we love them, just how much we love them. Share your ideas in the comment box below.

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